https://emmaletters.com/wp-content/uploads/2016/07/cropped-Emma-Blog-Logo-3-1-1-1024x205.png 0 0 Emma https://emmaletters.com/wp-content/uploads/2016/07/cropped-Emma-Blog-Logo-3-1-1-1024x205.png Emma2013-08-26 15:02:552013-08-26 15:02:55Il cuore e la anima - Heart and Soul
Il cuore e la anima – Heart and Soul
So this week has been filled with a lot of finding work. A lot of finding work. Lots of ups and downs, but so is life, right?
Really, this week has been more of a self-reflection week for me. Not intentionally. A mission really makes you realize a lot about yourself really quickly. So here’s the reflection. A little heart and soul. Less stories today, mi scusi.
1) I am a stubborn person. Aren’t we all though? Especially the people we meet here – they are stubborn!
2) I give my heart, but it scares me. It scares me a lot. We meet these people, and I bear my soul to them. I tell them everything that is most dear to me. And I try to pray with them, but instead they sit there and laugh at us while we’re praying. And since I give my heart, it hurts when it breaks. But if I don’t give my whole heart to them, there is less of a chance that they will accept it. I have to give my heart to them.
3) I blame myself to avoid conflict. I’ll leave it at that. But I gotta stop doing this, I know. Sometimes it’s just easier.
4) I can sit here all day and testify about the Atonement, but who am I to not access it myself? Who am I to not believe that my weaknesses can become strengths? The Atonement is such a deep concept that none of us can ever completely understand, but we have to access it every day.
This week all of our new/old (except one) investigators dropped us. I had fallen in love with them. And this beautiful Italian woman, who is 27, and was so interested, just doesn’t have time to worry about this right now. The setting of it was quite… picturesque. It started raining, and the sky got gray and dark, and the wind was blowing. Just imagine it. She said – “It’s not my time right now. I work all day. I’m too exhausted to make these kind of commitments.”
And it’s all we can say that – these commitments will make your burdens seem lighter! We promise. Christ will help you feel light. It can only bless your life. And then she says, no I don’t think you understand me, no ti capisci, I won’t meet with you anymore. Ah. Mamma mia, it hurts.
We are working with some members and less-actives in the church as well, and that is a rewarding work. We are seeing hearts change. It’s taken three months to make the smallest influence with this woman in our ward, but we’re almost there. She is beginning to understand faith on a deeper level. Almost 🙂
I came to Italy just wanting to touch people’s lives, in some small way. In some small way, I want them to feel God’s love.
I know, I know, I know without any doubt that this is God’s church. This is His work. Although we are tracting day in and day out in the hot month of August, I know He is with me. I know that He loves me, even if I can’t be the perfect missionary for Him. I can be me. I can be me, the Emma who gets guilty over little things, who gives her whole heart to everyone even if they’ll break it, the Emma who laughs over the silliest things and when I get really excited I shake my hands really fast and jump up and down a little bit. Oh, and of course I like to be dramatic about things. It makes life more interesting, lets be honest 🙂 I’m learning that as I be myself, that’s how Heavenly Father wants me to touch people.
I love, love, love getting to know Heavenly Father’s children here in Italy. To hear the stories of the random people on the street, our investigators, our ward members who joined many years ago, the other missionaries, and everyone. I feel this love for people as soon as they tell me their name. We talk of God. I get a little glimpse into their hearts and souls. It’s beautiful. It’s unexplainable. It’s my favorite thing in the world.
On a funny note – this week we found this man from India in a park and we taught him the Restoration. He was a little… sexist, to say the least. He started going off about women being irrational and not thinking before they act. I almost lost it. Thank goodness for my amazing companion who was there to stop me after I said – Excuse me, but we are women… It was pretty funny. He actually became a new investigator for the Anziani to teach as well, so we’ll see what happens!
I love you all! Thank you for reading my letter of random thoughts. I love my mission every day. Words cannot express… I am beyond grateful to be able to serve right now at this time in my life. I am happy 🙂 So happy, because I know God is with us as we seek out the salvation of His children.
Vi voglio bene,
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